Not Your Fault, But Mine
by The Cocky Undead
Summary: Stiles struggles with his grief over the news of Allison, blaming himself for what happened. Set after 3x23 (Insatiable).


**[Not Your Fault, But Mine]**

"It should have been you." The words are like a slap, but Stiles knows it's true. It _should_ have been him who died, not Allison.

He dips his head, letting his chin bump against his chest. He doesn't want to look at the accusing faces staring at him.

"Isaac." Scott's voice is soft, thick with emotion, but it still holds power. The power of the Alpha. "That's enough."

Stiles swallows and finally looks up. Lydia, Scott, and Isaac had all gathered around the couch where an unconscious Stiles had been deposited the night before. Stiles glances outside the window of the McCall house, and realizes that it's hardly morning. It's grey outside, the sun just barely coming up.

"Where's my dad?" Stiles finally asks, for lack of anything better to say and because he feels a sudden stab of fear not knowing where his dad is.

"He was here." Scott says, "He left ten minutes ago…Mr. Argent…" He stops, choking on his words. Scott brushes a hand across his face, bowing his head for a moment.

Stiles can't stand knowing that Scott's pain is his fault. _It's his fault_.

He turns his gaze to Lydia, whose face is streaked with tears. Stiles can't handle the look that she has on her face; blank and cold. Like death. _It's his fault._

Stiles finally glances at Isaac, who is staring at him with a hard intensity. He swallows again. "I'm sorry." Stiles says softly.

Isaac snaps, lunging towards Stiles and jerking him to his feet. He slams Stiles against the wall, his hands buried in Stiles's jacket.

"_Sorry?_" Isaac snarls, "Sorry doesn't bring her back! She's dead. And it's your fault."

Stiles hangs limply in Isaac's grip, not fighting him. "I know." He says quietly.

Isaac shakes him roughly, tears finally breaking free and rolling down his cheeks.

"I know!" Stiles says louder. "I _know _it's my fault. It's my fault that Allison is…is dead." He stumbles on the word, his throat feeling thick.

"You should have been the one." Isaac snaps.

"I know." Stiles repeats. He rips free of Isaac's grip and steps back. "I should have died. Not her." He glances to Scott and Lydia, who had made a small move to help him when Isaac had grabbed him.

"And you know what?" Stiles says his voice stronger, "I probably will die soon."

With those words, he turns on his heel and stalks out of the room. Stiles throws open the McCall's screen door, banging it against the wall. He steps out onto their porch, wrapping his shaking arms around his torso.

Stiles stares out into the coming dawn, feeling numb. He tries not to think about what Scott had told him when he had woken up on the McCall's couch, how Allison was dead. Or how useless he had been at Oak Creek. While everyone had been trying to save Lydia, he had been the one to stagger to a halt, wheezing for breath, and finally drop off into unconsciousness. Useless. He was useless.

"Stiles?" Scott's voice is hesitant behind him.

Stiles glances over his shoulder, but doesn't say anything. Scott takes that as an invitation to come stand next to his friend.

"It's not your fault—," Scott begins before Stiles cuts him off.

"Yes, it is."

"No." Scott insists. "It's not. You didn't ask to be possessed by the nogitsune. You didn't ask for anything of it. We tried to save you because you're our friend. It's the same reason that we all went to Oak Creek to save Lydia. She's our friend."

Stiles listens impassively, his eyes staring straight ahead and not at his friend.

"Allsion…Allison was there of her own free will. She was doing what she does best, 'protect those who can't protect themselves,'" Scott frowns, trying to keep his emotions in check, but some of it bleeds into his voice. "She died saving Isaac. She died a hero."

Stiles breathes heavily through his nose, trying hard to keep his face emotionless, but he fails.

Stiles turns his head towards Scott, his eyes bright with tears. "But, you promised me that no one else would get hurt—killed because of me! You promised!"

"I know." Scott says, guilt tinging his voice now. "And I failed. That's on me, Stiles, not you."

Stiles shakes his head, disagreeing, but doesn't say anything more.

"Stiles." Scott tries again. "You're my best friend…and I would never lie to you. So believe me when I tell you _this is not your fault._"

Silence falls on them for a moment.

"Scott…" Stiles finally says, his voice thick with tears. He fully turns to Scott and suddenly buries his head into Scott's shoulder, wrapping his arms around his best friend. He feels Scott's arms encircle his shuddering frame.

They don't say anything more. Both of them clinging to each other like a dying man. They are each other's anchors; brothers till the end.

* * *

**A/N: Hey guys. So, I had to write something after that episode...I hope this turned out well and that you guys like it. **


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